I speak a few languages but not perfect at any. I'm not the shortest among my peers but I'm not standing tall at 5'7" either. I don't stutter but I do mumble. I'm smart but I'm not wise. I know my way around Photoshop but I don't know what CSS is. I have answers to problems but none to mine. I started out loving science but haven't touched a calculator in years. I have the gift of gab but lose it around an employer or a pretty girl. People laugh at me, not with me. At least I make people laugh?! I'm a nerd who once got pissed drunk on a regular basis. I play the drums better than my friends, but never good enough to land a recording contract. I taught guitar for two years but I cannot play a guitar solo. I excel at school probably to end up slaving behind a cubicle.
I think of the wittiest things to say but never remember enough to write them down.